How TO Be Nigerian No. 8

No. 8-

Have Bad Reputation Internationally.

Hey guys, how has the journey to being Nigerian been? I hope you have been enjoying the ride just as I have been. On this number, let’s go international. To be Nigerian, please please, endeavor to have a bad reputation internationally. It does not matter how much good Nigerians have done. It does not matter that in OPEC, UN, ECOWAS and other international organisations Nigerians are representing beautifully. Nor does it even matter that in several prestigious Universities in the UK, US, Russia, Ukraine, Germany, many other nations, not to talk of at home Nigerians are making the highest distinctions. In fact, it never matters that in several places all over the world, Nigerians are trail blazers in several fields ranging from sport to business, music to education, comedy to acting, science and technology and so on. I assure you that these very important achievements do not count. What matters, I must tell you is the nation is one of the most corrupt in Africa, what matters are the foreign bank accounts our swindler leaders have in most of these foreign nations. What matters most is that Nigerians are drug peddlers, swindlers; popularly called yahoo-yahoo or G-boys. What matters is that despite the obvious Nigerians that are doing great legitimate things, another percentage are doing illegitimate things and that’s what counts.

How To Be Nigerian No. 7

No. 7- Laugh and create memes on everything

To be Nigerian, you have to know how to laugh at everything, funny or not. Just a little mistake and the whole Nigeria is rolling in memes and jokes. Like the case of the teacher in Edo state that couldn't properly read a letter and had to be corrected to the point of exasperation by the governor, in the  background, several people were laughing, forgetting that this was a national embarrassment and a call for a serious look into the state of education in that state and the nation as a whole, or that case of "spended" or "my fellow widows" that's on one hand.

How To Be Nigerian No. 6

NO. 6- Be Smart, Be Tough

Sorry this is coming 23 hours late, I had serious network issues yesterday. Nothing was working right. Well then, here we go. To be Nigerian, you have to be tough. Very tough. Nigeria has no patience for weakling, mentally and physically. It is just not allowed. An average Nigerian’s mantra is “I be naija pikin o!” that has to be said with an amused/incredulous expression. As a naija pikin, no one can cheat you. Well, except a fellow naija pikin. In Nigeria, you match wits against wits. When arguing for example, you should things like ‘you think say you dey craze? I get craze pass you.” The word craze can be substituted with other adjectives such as mad, stupid and etc. over the world, Nigerians are known as drug peddlers, thieves, scammers, as so on. That’s a lie. The thing is, Nigerian are just tough, tough really is the word. Survival against all odds. We have learnt to do this, trust me NEPA and the government has taught us so much.